There's Never Food in the Fridge

"This is why we don't have wives." (said by two females)

I Misheard You #12

MS: We haven't even found time to play Portal together.
IC: *laughing very hard*

He thought I said "porno."

I Can Tell You About Last of Us

"Wait, don't tell me about it.  Because I might see it maybe never."

I Have No Idea How Carrots Work

"Do you want a floppy carrot?"

Eating Carrots

"Put it in your mouth.... Slower."

What if They Paid You Your Wage In Food?

".. That's a lot of food though."

Can You Just Give Me $50,000?

"And then we heli'd off the heli."