Things I Say to the Boyfriend #1

"You could be a stripper if you were desperate."

The Tub is Clogged

"You're talking through your burps."

Fiddy Sense

"If you think about it, it makes 50 cents."

Post Party

"I peed in the alley for you."

#SandySez #1

"Coconut orgasm."

Prometheus

"I'm not Anti-metheus, but I'm not Pro-metheus."

I Forgot To Try So Now I Have Three Arms

"Look at you being all bilaterally symmetrical!"

Horse Animations

"Give his horse a little tug."

Following Lego Instructions

"I'm just slow poking it."

Having Children

"And you can't undo it. Oh! Ctrl-Z! Ctrl-Z!"

When's Your Last Day?

BP:  We're gonna give you tequila shots.  And then you'll come back to work smashed.
MS:  Then I'll check everything out.  Change all the files.  Check them back in.  Then check them back out.  And kick in the monitor.

Come Sit With Us

"You can sit on my lap, and see what comes up first."

Wang'imators

"Chicken wangs?"

Food is Here?

"Wah wah wee wah."

Married With Children

RS:  The other thing I remember is when Al would put his hand in his pants.
MS:  Why would you do that?
RS:  It's just comforting.  Touch your pubes.

Canadian Tire

RS:  Did you guys buy tires?
RW:  No.  Canadians.

Overtime

"If I got killed by pointy things* now, it might not be so bad."

*Reaver pointy things

Benefits

"Friends with medical and dental benefits."

The Hobbit 3: The Hobbitting!

KD:  Going to this opening day, I've made a hobbit of doing that for all the movies.
AU:  This movie is so long it'll dragon and on and on...
TK:  If you like it then you should've put a Ring on it.
MS:  AU, don't dwarf the epicness of this film.
TCR:  I can't wait to see it and sit down with my precious and start goblin on that hot buttered popcorn.
KD:  It's going to be epic, no matter what, it'll be an ENTertaining movie.
TCR:  KD, I am shocked you made that joke, I thought you were shire than that!
DS:

That One Mocap Actor's Data That Pisses You Off

"Come visit my website, thatfuckingguy.com"

Want Some of My Bagel?

"I didn't think you could back wash a bagel."

I Don't Really Like Sherlock

RW:  He's an asshole and I don't really like assholes.
JD:  No, you do like assholes.
RW:  Well, in my private life...
JD:  You mean our private life.

I Misheard You #13

"Funnier than a hearse full of ducks."

Witcher 3

KD:  That first soldier sure got a bird's eye view of everything.
JM:  Eye see what you did there...
TK:  It's not something to crow about.
TCR:  I bet you really had to hunt and peck for that last pun...
KD:  I generally don't have to think for very long for a pun, I just wing it.
AU:  Now that one just flew over my head... Someone spell it out for me.
TCR:  Sometimes you just need some perspective on this, "a bird's eye view" if you will...
TK:  You just repeated KD's pun.  Did you go stark raven mad?
KD:  Not sure if that upped the ante... More like just adding some feathering to pretty it up.
TCR:  I apologize, I didn't meen to rook KD's pun out from under him.
KD:  Glad you apologized, was about to beak you off.
BP:  Whoa, whoa, whoa, let's not lose our heads here.
JM:  Everybody feather get back to work.
DS:  I suspect fowl play.
DS:  I only saw one crow in that whole intro.  I guess that'd be an (puts on sunglasses) attempted murder?
TCR:  Who keeps egging you people on?
KD:  Sometimes I just feel the need to crack out of my shell.

I Can See The Music

"I remember my drug days.  All 5 of them."

Home Time

"Making like a baby and heading out!"

Stupid Non-Baby

"Hmm I gotta come up with a dark matter analogy for a non-existent fetus."

Almond Milk

"It's like it's trying to be a flavour."

An Old Tale

A friend once woke up from a nap, helped himself to a large plate of spaghetti his friends had made, continued to take his seat at the table, while holding the plate at an angle allowing the spaghetti to slowly slide off and onto his clothes.  His reaction was:

"What is wrong with this spaghetti??!"

Upon Discovering Nudity Mods for The Sims

"Good for them!"

Awesome Tagline

"Party at RS's funeral."

Career Stuff

BR:  Now that they know you are a better animator than Jesus.
MS: Jesus couldn't turn water into spline.

Pleatherrealm

"The most vegan-friendly fetish bar."

There's Never Food in the Fridge

"This is why we don't have wives." (said by two females)

I Misheard You #12

MS: We haven't even found time to play Portal together.
IC: *laughing very hard*

He thought I said "porno."

I Can Tell You About Last of Us

"Wait, don't tell me about it.  Because I might see it maybe never."

I Have No Idea How Carrots Work

"Do you want a floppy carrot?"

Eating Carrots

"Put it in your mouth.... Slower."

What if They Paid You Your Wage In Food?

".. That's a lot of food though."

Can You Just Give Me $50,000?

"And then we heli'd off the heli."

The Life of an Animator

"We breathe life into animation by draining our own."

Full Circle

At the start of dinner...
BP:  For some reason I woke up with dry lips.  I'm not sure why.

At the end of dinner...
BP:  I don't want to take the leftovers home.  I want to take you home, A.
AU:  I'll keep your lips moist.

Mohawk Mullets

KS:  I'd throw up.
RS:  Throw up, then give the guy a high five.

Rice Krispies

"I've never met a person who hates Rice Krispie squares.  If I ever find the person, I'm gonna tell them 'You're a fucking idiot!'"

$20 Foot Massages

"You went? Or you came?"

Eye Contact

"I find it hard to work with a boner all day."

Baconwave

"Why does everyone want to stop me from eating bacon?"

It Was Not A Fart

#QueefLatifah

Juggling School and Work

"Get rich or die splinin'!"

Perforce is Down

"I let myself become dependent on Perforce; I have Perforce addiction."

Can't Tell if Flirting

MS: maya wears the pants in this relationship.

IC: does maya ever take her pants off? so lame sorry, maybe maya is always wearing pants...

MS: lol maya withholds until i make cool animation.

IC: oooh, then what happens?

MS: lol it would melt your face.

IC: so faces are involved... umumum.

MS: double faced polys.

IC: you really should get out more.

I Can E-Mail From My Phone???

"If I bought a new iPhone last year, it'd be iPhone Last Year."

Fears

"Do you know what the sum of all my fears is?  Zero."

Side Boob

MS:  I just noticed Scorpion has side boob showing.
AU:  Dat side boob.  Does it make the ladies... Get over there?

Relationships

"I can't wait until I'm with someone who doesn't want me around either."

Death Wish

"I'd just like to die old, with my partner, and spooning."

Anicrastination

ˌanəˈkrastəˈnāSHən,prō-/
noun

The action of delaying or postponing a difficult section of animation for a simpler one.

Is There A Toilet Here?

BC: Just go in the bushes.
MS: I told you, I haven't grown one yet!

The Future of Game Dev

Let's start our own studio! With blackjack! And hookers!

Kayaking

MS: Forecast says rain.
BC: B-Tek is going, that's the only forecast you need.

It's Not As Bad As It Sounds

"And I was standing at my door wondering if I should go in or not. And then I saw my girlfriend and child waving at me through the window."

Because

"Why can't you ______ in Motionbuilder?"
"Because Motionbuilder."

When You Give A Month's Notice

"Speaking of abandons, just speak to Melissa!"

WIPs Gone Wild

"I'm pitching tents, taking photos and posting them on WIPs."

Too Soon?

"Or you could marry me and then get separated."

Max Capacity

"Once I get my insults down, I'm gonna consider becoming a trainer."